my back injury

On March 3, 2006, I was a 19-year-old college freshman playing beach volleyball in Florida on spring break. It was a tish windy but we wanted to get in one final game before we packed up to make the long drive back to Indiana. My partner set me and I jumped to hit. The wind…

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be gentle with yourself

Over the years I have found that I am my own harshest critic. It’s not fair to me that I preach being kind and understanding to others, but not affording myself that same courtesy. Please be gentle with yourself.  If you struggle with mental illness and have trouble getting out of bed, give yourself some…

The past year…

Note: This is the first post of many that walks through what I went through in 2019. I've been writing as a form of therapy, and it is mentally draining and exhausting to detail every up and down my life has been on. I am hoping that by doing this in multiple parts, it will…

when your body betrays you

I came to the hard realization today that I need to learn how to pace myself better. I tend to forget I’m not healthy and try to do way too much, then I end up crashing and feeling guilty and worthless when I am not fully present in a social setting or cannot accomplish my…

starting new

Today is really hard. Actually, everyday has been really hard lately. It feels physically impossible to get out of bed. When the only thing I feel capable of is playing a game on my phone to distract me from reality. Days where I wonder why I’m still fighting this burden and I constantly repeat “Lord,…